The Nice Girl Syndrome
How women can overcome the pressure to please and feel free to be their true selves Women who are too nice send the message that they are an easy target to be taken advantage of. Being too nice also prevents women from standing up for themselves and keeps them in unhealthy or even abusive relationships. In this groundbreaking book, Engel, an internationally acclaimed abuse expert, helps women confront the beliefs and behaviors that keep them stuck in their Nice Girl act while replacing them with healthier, more empowering ones. Filled with the stories of women Engel has worked with over the years, this helpful guide offers practical, much-needed advice.
Review by Publishers Weekly
Engel (Healing Your Emotional Self), a psychotherapist and domestic violence expert, has sharp words for the “nice girls” of the world who care more about being perceived as sweet and pleasant than strong and self-protective. Drop the phoniness and passivity, she exhorts, arguing that while society superficially rewards nice girls, they suffer deeply in their intimate and work relationships by losing personal power and parading inauthentic selves. Avoiding conflict and playing naïve may seem to offer payoffs, Engel notes, but the payoffs aren’t as big as the price women pay for not holding their ground—”They may get taken care of but they aren’t respected. They may get special attention but from the wrong kind of people.” Readers will find Engel’s elucidation of the four causes of “Nice Girl Syndrome” and the “Seven Types of Nice Girls” (i.e., Doormat, Pretender, Prude, Enlightened One) deeply funny and familiar. Most useful for its thorough treatment for how “nice girls” are socialized and for Engel’s concise antidote (the four “Power C’s”: confidence, competence, conviction and courage) this book will challenge, entertain and empower its readers. (July)
Testimonials
Book History
Article: The Nice Girl Syndrome, Psychjourney (www.psychjourneypodcast.com) Sept. 08
Article in Santa Barbara News Press, Sept 2008
Article in Body and Soul Magazine, August 2008
Article in New Liviing Magazine, Oct. 08
Interview, Mountain Mama Radio, Sept. 2008
Interview, AOL Canada, Oct. 2008
